23 September 2014

A bunch of stuff I don't know what to do with! Please help!

Welcome to Autumn!

As everyone knows, today is the first day of autumn (or spring if you're a southern hemisphere person [but what really is south, anyway?]), the time of the year when I begin a new year. I know it goes against everything I've been told in my life, but I prefer to clear out the cobwebs of the year just as summer turns to autumn, to better prepare myself for the lovely hardships to come as autumn grinds into winter and winter tries our souls.

(Those who require more autumnal reverie would do well to click over to Connie J. Jasperson's blog here!)

So I shall try to clear out the random notes I've collected during the preceding year. Often I simply copy and paste some clever words seen on social media or elsewhere on the vast whiteboard known as the internet. Sometimes I have a profound thought myself but I'm not awake enough to type it coherently. Whatever I save, I usually do not try to interpret right away.

Now would be a good time to see what is useful. They may be useful for you, as well. Help yourself!

RANDOM NOTES from 2014

Remember: If it's not worth writing about, it's not worth doing.

If you're not going to write about it, why do it?

If you would just write what you do...that'd be great.


1. supposably = I suppose I am able
2. For all intensive purposes = this is for those purposes which are intense
3. irregardless = not regardless = regardful
4. I could care less = I could care less but I choose not to
5. Expresso = expressing oneself with a complex coffee order
6. Pacifically = referring to the Pacific Ocean
7. Ex cetera = used to be similar
8. I seen it. = I used to see it but not any more.
9. Of upmost importance = the person at the top of the ladder
10. I need to lay down = someone with a duck feather fetish


A Bunny a Day Keeps the Blahs Away!


“Life isn’t divided into genres. It’s a horrifying, romantic, tragic, comical, science-fiction cowboy detective novel. You know, with a bit of pornography if you’re lucky.”
Alan Moore


“Thy soul shall find itself alone
’Mid dark thoughts of the gray tombstone—
Not one, of all the crowd, to pry
Into thine hour of secrecy.

Be silent in that solitude,
Which is not loneliness—for then
The spirits of the dead who stood
In life before thee are again
In death around thee—and their will
Shall overshadow thee: be still. [...]”

 Edgar Allan Poe, Spirits of the Dead: Tales and Other Poems


Ich will gar nicht wissen, was ich alles nicht weiß.

I do not even want to know what I do not know everything.


acosmist - One who believes that nothing exists
paralian - A person who lives near the sea
aureate - Pertaining to the fancy or flowery words used by poets
dwale - To wander about deliriously
sabaism - The worship of stars
dysphoria - An unwell feeling
aubade - A love song which is sung at dawn
eumoirous - Happiness due to being honest and wholesome
mimp - To speak in a prissy manner, usually with pursed lips

Used in a sentence (by Yours Truly):

It comes as no surprise to the paralian acosmist that when one seeks to dwale or partake of sabaism, a certain dysphoria may be confused for an aureate aubade; unless, of course, one's eumoirous mimp remains mimetically disjuncted.


" 그냥 좋은 걸로 만족하는가? 좋은 것이 있고, 가장 좋은 것도 얻을수 있는데."

" Why settle for Good when Better is available and Best is achievable?"


Query letter (first draft)

Dear whoever,
Attached is my great masterpiece that I'm sure you're gonna love so much. It really rocks!
While you get this into print, please be advised I'm writing another book which I just know you're gonna absolutely love, too!
Please forward my banking info to the lucky publisher you find for my books and they can maybe start sending my advance on royalties because I'm, like, really poor at the moment but I got vacation plans to deal with.
Thanks a bunch!!!


vampires. they're like chiggers but sexier.




8 to 10 servings


1 head romaine lettuce, coarsely chopped, divided
1 cup frozen peas, divided
½ red onion, finely diced, divided
12 ounces bacon, cooked and crumbled, divided
3 hard-boiled eggs, peeled and diced, divided
1½ cups shredded cheddar cheese, divided
1 bunch green onions, thinly sliced, divided

For the Dressing:

1 cup sour cream
1 cup mayonnaise
½ cup granulated sugar
2 tablespoons white vinegar
Salt and pepper, to taste


1. In a medium bowl, whisk together all of the dressing ingredients; set aside.

2. Place one-third of the lettuce in the bottom of a trifle dish. Top with one-third each of the peas, red onion, bacon, hard-boiled egg, cheese and green onions. Spread one-third of the dressing over the top.

3. Repeat layers again, ending with the dressing.

4. For the last set of layers, begin again with the lettuce, peas and red onion, then cover with the remaining dressing. Top the dressing with the bacon, hard-boiled egg, cheese and green onions. Cover and refrigerate for at least 30 minutes before serving. 


#bestkeptsecret   (hashtag for promoting books that have fallen below 4,000,000 in Amazon rank)


So shocking not even Yoda could unsee them!



Final homework assignment
No due date

Please be happy.

By the time you are ready to turn in this assignment, I will probably be in heaven.
Don’t rush your report. Feel free to take your time.
But someday, please turn to me and say “I did it. I’ve become happy.”
I’ll be waiting.


The apotheosis of the form.

Beethoven #5
Tchaikovsky #6
Mahler #10
Sibelius #2
Shostakovich #5
Dvorak #5
Prokofiev #1
Brahms #3
Berlioz Symphonie Fantastique
Nielsen #4


Dis-moi qui t'admire et je te dirai qui tu es.

Charles Auguste SAINTE-BEUVE, Causeries du lundi, 20 avril 1850

Tell me who admires you and I'll tell you who you are.


“It is easy, when you are young, to believe that what you desire is no less than what you deserve, to assume that if you want something badly enough , it is your God-given right to have it...I was a raw youth who mistook passion for insight and acted according to an obscure, gap-ridden logic. I thought climbing the Devils Thumb would fix all that was wrong with my life. In the end, of course, it changed almost nothing. But I came to appreciate that mountains make poor receptacles for dreams. And I lived to tell my tale.”

Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild



"At least I got to experience pregnancy."


(C) Copyright 2010-2014 by Stephen M. Swartz. All Rights Reserved. No part of this blog, whether text or image, may be used without me giving you written permission, except for brief excerpts that are accompanied by a link to this entire blog. Violators shall be written into novels as characters who are killed off. Serious violators shall be identified and dealt with according to the laws of the United States of America.


  1. I especially like definition #4: I could care less = I could care less but I choose not to

    We should all strive to abide by this rule.

  2. I'm gonna make that salad!!! Thanks!!!!

  3. Pretty sure you spelled "espresso" wrong, or maybe you spelled it phonetically with that Kansas accent.