Another 5th of the 5th of the 5th!

Dear Fifthers,

It's been a while. A while since I last posted the 5th paragraph of the 5th page of the 5th chapter as a blog post. That was in 2019 - right before I had to bow out for the illness that months later was called Covid-19. You can find that old blog post here, and read the 5th of the 5th of the 5th of my books published up to that date.

When that situation developed in March 2020, when my university switched from in-person classes to online only classes, I was about to publish my next book, a crime thriller called EXCHANGE. Due to the crisis I delayed the launch by two months - only then deciding that people stuck at home might like to read a book.

Then, still stuck at home, I worked on two novels that remained unpublished pending revisions. First was YEAR OF THE TIGER* (the last book on the older 5-5-5 blog post), the THE MASTERS' RIDDLE - the most sci-fiy of all my books as it concerns a non-human protagonist: the captured alien being who fights against his captors and tries to return home.

Then comes the FLU SEASON series. At first it was to be a stand-alone novel of a Mom and her teen son escaping from a city in chaos in the sixth year of a pandemic. The one-off became a trilogy, then another trilogy was added, then a sequel - taking our family members across a couple hundred years.

And that will bring us up to date - as I prepare to launch my next novel, a mighty epic of medieval America, A TIME OF KINGS. You can read about it here. It is not your descendant's medieval drama.

The 5th paragraph of the 5th page of the 5th chapter!

EXCHANGE (2020)

“Have a seat,” he offered, and Bill sat, pulling a worried mask over his face. These were the chairs where people got a talking-to. Angry parents, surly students, the odd Board member or two. The Griff was good at that kind of talking. “Bill,” the principal began, “I’m surprised to see you back so quick. You really need to take time off. Now, I’m no counselor but I think you could do with some counselling. You know? You’ve gone through a heckuva lot. The shock phase is just ending but there’s a long way to go to get you—”

THE MASTERS' RIDDLE (2021)

The Masters come as they choose, the shaman explained, and they take who they choose. She should not let cuts enter her heart or stones grow in her belly. Allowing that would make her as silent as those who had unexpectedly left the community of Aull, those who had vanished like the cool out-breath whenever a mind-cave collapsed. 

THE FLU SEASON SAGA

Book 1: THE BOOK OF MOM (2022)

If the towers were still active we would likely only get official announcements and out-of-service messages. No room for idle chat on private apps. They had blocked ordinary citizens, non-essential phone users before. Calling in food deliveries was allowed, but people sent a list which was quicker. Otherwise, they would be happy to collect our chats to add to their databases, to sort us into good and bad. That was how they determined who’d spread the virus, sector by sector, then sent health police to detain the bad ones and reward the good ones. Mom said it was a racket.

Book 2: THE WAY OF THE SON (2023)

“They sure can,” said Hannah and referenced a song by one of her favorite pandemic bands, Viral Dark: ‘Black Lab, under a viral sky / Breathe in deep, you’re gotta die / Cooking soup / Sneaky group / Spreading their poison all over the world’ – meaning the laboratory, not the dog.

Book 3: DAWN OF THE DAUGHTERS (2023)

My daddy taught me numbers as we cleared the area of marauder bodies. He taught me adding and subbing. We pulled one body over the slope to what he called the graveyard – where the wolves knew there would be food – so four bodies with one rolled over the ledge left three bodies, for example. He kept quizzing me and I kept giving him the right answers.

Book 4: THE BOOK OF DAD (2024)

It had been Mother’s habit to go over to her parents’ grave at the edge of the clearing, kneel and talk to them each day. She made me kneel beside her, put my hands together for prayer. She told them about her latest child: “This is Fritz,” she told them, “named for our long ago ancestor on account of him being this kind of some new beginning for us, all us, like that ancestor did long time ago, him and that tuba.” She apologized to Grandma Hannah for getting together with Frank, my father, the same man who had a daughter with Hannah: my big sister Cherie, who I’d never met because she was so much older that she was already married and lived far away before I was born.

Book 5: THE GRANDDAUGHTER (2024)

We stand on the production line, Eve across from me, as paper boxes move along in strict order. Other women, wearing aprons, stand to either side of us. Each of us places an item into the box as it moves past us. Eve’s job is to fold down the top of the box after I place the final item in: a cracker in a clear wrapper. But the lid has wings which always catch on the side walls and crumple the box. She was trained for an hour before put on the line but she gets admonished countless times by supervisors wielding slapsticks. I offer to trade tasks with her but our supervisors say they can’t allow it based on our papers. So we have to endure it.

Book 6: THE GRANDSONS (2025)

“You know I went to the dentistry college in Kanza City,” I like to remind him. “No matter that I’m Sheriff Baumann’s grandson, I made top marks in the classes there. No matter that my mama was Kanza. I’m the best of both of them.”

THE WARRIORS BAUMANN (call it Book 7 if you like) (December 2025)

He tramped along the trail. The vegetation closed on him, twigs brushing his arms and knees as he rode on. Perhaps this was the wrong trail. Wasn’t the one he and Rory had traveled going to the fort. He sensed he might be lost. Better to return the way he’d come, start again from the gate.

And, as a sneak peek, here is the fifth paragraph of the fifth page of the fifth chapter of the forthcoming A TIME OF KINGS - launching August 8, 2026.

And so the world lay as if carved into stone: the central Realm of Chicageaux, their capital New Cago, the Royal family and their kin, and allies spreading across a fair portion of the Americus, making a grand kingdom – a Realm! King Rodrick sat pleased upon his great throne in his great Hall within his great palace, growing bored upon his soft seat with the world at peace. And a steward would keep his goblet filled with beverages from across the Realm. Another of the staff would bring him reports of news from other lands. One night or another he would take his rest with the Queen.

There is another book that follows A TIME OF KINGS, with only a working title until I find the perfect name for it. And I do have the fifth chapter written already. Thus, I could include the fifth paragraph of the fifth page, but let's not rush into it. Let it go through the thorough review process and be sent to the launch pad before we subject it to blog posts.

*YEAR OF THE TIGER, although launching in 2020, was listed on the 2019 "5 of 5 of 5" post because those books were listed in chronological order of when they were written. Year of the Tiger, a dramatic story of hunters competing to kill a man-eater, has a sordid history of revision and submission and more revision and more submission before finally being perfected for 2020. 

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(C) Copyright 2010-2026 by Stephen M. Swartz. All Rights Reserved. No part of this blog, whether text or image, may be used without me giving you written permission, except for brief excerpts that are accompanied by a link to this entire blog. Violators shall be written into novels as characters who are killed off. Serious violators shall be identified and dealt with according to the laws of the United States of America.

The 5th of the 5th of the 5th!

Sure, it's a made-up holiday, this May the 4th Be With You Day. It easily follows the laborious Labor Day otherwise known as May Day and its celebrations around the world. And which is followed in short order by the equally sanctimonious Revenge of the 5th Day (that is, "Revenge of the Sith" a Star Wars film phrase). And that coincides with the Mexican holiday of Cinco de Mayo, the 5th of May, the celebration of an old battle victory over the French invaders. (You can google it: the French actually tried to conquer Mexico.)

cinco de meow

Nevertheless, I shall celebrate my own day on May 5th (since I eat plenty of tacos throughout the year anyway). I shall call this day The 5th of the 5th of the 5th! On this day I shall reveal for public scrutiny the fifth paragraph of the fifth page of the fifth chapter of each of my completed novels...no matter what it may be, whether full of self-revelation or not. For your sake, I am willing to take that risk.

And so without further delay... here are the 5th paragraphs from the 5th pages of the 5th chapters:

1. The Last Song (written in 1981, not yet published; this book is divided into four "symphonic movements" so it does not have a 5th chapter; thus, I offer the fifth paragraph from the fifth chapter-like section):

    “I learned the theory of the music of the gods, from the Discovery," the old music teacher grumbled. "The real music! And now...now they’ve gone so far astray. It’s pitiful, downright pitiful. I pity all of them, those greedy, lazy free composers.  Music destroyers is what I call them!”

2. Year of the Tiger, an adventure tale of an obsessed hunter's pursuit of a man-eater in India (written first in 1983; coming later in 2019)

Between the dull throbbing in his chest and the steady ache in his head, his vivid consciousness began to waver. He slipped back and forth from the soothing pastel walls of his room to a steamy, vegetated world of jungle bird calls and the incessant thumping of native drums. Sweating profoundly, he listened to the drums, then the birds, then the rustling of the leaves around him. A breeze wafted over him, humid and heavy, pressing him deeper into his mattress. The drums faded away, then the birds.

3. Aiko (written in 1988; mercilessly drummed out of Amazon's 2014 Breakthrough Novel Awards competition; revised and published anyway!)

      It was the 80s, he considered, wondering where his youth had gone, already in his thirties and fearing he had missed something. Japan was opening up to internationalization, long past recovering from the ravages of war and hardships of reconstruction. Now Japan had stepped out as an equal among nations, pressing for leadership in the international community. Stereotypes were falling away. Slowly. No longer were images of geisha and samurai what people thought of; endless varieties of electronics and quirky pop singers with pink hair and thigh-high boots were the most noticeable imports. Ben had to smile: he had never had any interest in Asia—not the culture, not the food, not the people, their languages, their fashions, nor their ways of doing business. He had only limited experience, anyway. In college his girlfriend had roomed with an exchange student from Korea. And in high school there was a chubby girl by the name of Yoko, but he never considered she was half-Japanese; she was just another American to him. Then he’d arrived in Hawaii.

4. The Dream Land (a.k.a. "Long Distance Voyager" - Book I of The Dream Land Trilogy), steampunk interdimensional adventure! (written in 1993)

“It’s...glorious,” she whispered, and he was surprised she could be so taken in by her own experiment. He had to agree, touching her hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze: it was beyond their expectations.

5. After Ilium, romantic adventure in Turkey (written for a college course in 1998)

      Alex knew they were talking about him, even though the words were Turkish. They sounded strangely like the drunken mutterings of his fraternity buddies, and the shadows shifted to become his roommate, Nick, with a swarthy face and black, curled beard, like statues of the old Greek king, Agamemnon, that he’d seen in museums. Nick had been killed driving home from spring break six weeks before graduation, a trip Alex had reluctantly declined, citing an important paper that was due. The shadows shifted and Nick was replaced by the image of the doctor—the image of how he thought the doctor appeared.

6. A Beautiful Chill, a campus affair turned ugly... (written as MFA thesis, 2002)

“We are lovers,” she says, taking his arm so there will be no confusion.

7. The Dream Land (Book II "Dreams of Future's Past")

McElroy lowered his head, seething. He had never hit a woman before, though he had come close several times. He had always managed to hit a wall or a door. Once he hit himself—his head—against a door to release his anger. He did not carry his pistol tonight since they were going out to dinner in a nice restaurant. But he could never hit a woman. He had too much respect for—

8. The Dream Land (Book III "Diaspora")

“No, course not.” Tammy giggled. “They are on another planet. How’m I supposed to have contact with them?”

9. A Dry Patch of Skin, the only medically accurate vampire tale!

     I resisted the easy double-entendre and responded thus: “My pleasure.” After all, I’ve learned over the years that the best way to assure anyone comes is to not make jokes until after it happens. (Oh, is that a dirty joke? I’m not sorry, nor am I offended that anyone might be offended. I did not come right out and say anything obscene. That is the beauty of the double-entendre: only those privy to the context find it clever. All others sit dumb-faced like wilted flowers. All right then, I apologize. Next time, bring your own jokes.)

10. A Girl Called Wolf, an arctic adventure tale based on a true life.

     “Anna?” Somebody called my name, my Catholic name that the Lord of Denmark chose for me. I turned and there was a woman with red hair. She ran up to me and hugged me before I could move.

11. Epic Fantasy *With Dragons, an epic fantasy that has dragons, a dragonslayer, a boy from the palace kitchen, an old magus, a little princess, a valley of death, and a whole lot more!

    Corlan arose, weary and sore. He stumbled to the door, hung on the handle a few breaths, and realized as he opened the door that he was still naked. After the hours with Petula, he cared not. He simply wanted to keep that memory fixed in his mind, playing the afternoon tryst over and over.

12. SUNRISE, Book 2 in the Stefan Szekely Trilogy (the sequel to A DRY PATCH OF SKIN), in which the hero from Book I finds himself 13 years later in a changed world, trying to start living the vampire playboy lifestyle.

     Yet I retain the powers which my affliction has given me: first, the power to frighten. Dogs and children are easiest to disturb. Women are either seductively attracted or immediately flee in horror. Men stand their ground to fight me, especially if women and children are present. The weaker ones will likely flee. Second, within my thin, decrepit body I have strength no one would suspect. And surprising speed should I need to escape. And I cannot be killed. I do not feel pain—or much of any sensations, yet I can sense many things, like a clairvoyant. 

13. SUNSET, Book 3 of the Stefan Szekely Trilogy (the conclusion of the tale, available now!) in which we re-meet our hero in particularly dire circumstances many years further into the future...

    Nóra did not look up as she worked. “He touched the Letter.”

(Granted it is not such a telling paragraph, unless you are now curious about the letter. That could be inducement to give the trilogy a try. Who can say?)

Thus is revealed the 5th of the 5th of the 5th!

I encourage you to enjoy your tacos, your light-sabers, and should the mood strike you, go ahead and get yourself five books. Share with five friends and your life shall be made five-fold better by your generous acts!

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(C) Copyright 2010-2019 by Stephen M. Swartz. All Rights Reserved. No part of this blog, whether text or image, may be used without me giving you written permission, except for brief excerpts that are accompanied by a link to this entire blog. Violators shall be written into novels as characters who are killed off. Serious violators shall be identified and dealt with according to the laws of the United States of America.

The 5th of the 5th of the 5th!

Sure, it's a "made-up" holiday, this May the 4th Be With You Day. It easily follows the laborious Labor Day cum May Day celebrations and is followed in short order by the equally sanctimonious Revenge of the 5th Day (that is, "Revenge of the Sith"). And that coincides with the Mexican holiday of Cinco de Mayo, the 5th of May, the celebration of an old battle victory over the French invaders--if I still have my history correct; it's been a while. 










(Wow, I just wikipedied* it and I'm correct! Most people forget, if they ever knew, the French tried to take over Mexico.)

Nevertheless, I shall celebrate my own day on May 5th (since I eat plenty of tacos throughout the year, anyway), and I shall call this day The 5th of the 5th of the 5th! On this day I shall reveal for public scrutiny the fifth paragraph of the fifth page of the fifth chapter of each of my completed novels...no matter what it may be, whether self-revelatory or not. I am willing to take that risk.

And so without further delay...here are the fifth paragraphs of the fifth pages of the fifth chapters:


1. The Last Song (as this book is divided into four "movements" it does not have a true fifth chapter; thus, I shall offer the fifth paragraph from the fifth chapter-like "section"):

“I learned the theory of the music of the gods, from the Discovery[," the old music teacher grumbled]. The real music! And now...now they’ve gone so far astray. It’s pitiful, downright pitiful. I pity all of them, those greedy, lazy free composers.  Music destroyers is what I call them!”

2. Year of the Tiger (under revision; publication soon)

Between the dull throbbing in his chest and the steady ache in his head, his vivid consciousness began to waver. He slipped back and forth from the soothing pastel walls of his room to a steamy, vegetated world of jungle bird calls and the incessant thumping of native drums. Sweating profoundly, he listened to the drums, then the birds, then the rustling of the leaves around him. A breeze wafted over him, humid and heavy, pressing him deeper into his mattress. The drums faded away, then the birds.

3. Aiko (mercilessly drummed out of Amazon's 2014 Breakthrough Novel Awards competition; publishing soon)

It was the 80s, he considered, wondering where his youth had gone, already in his thirties and fearing he had missed something. Japan was opening up to internationalization, long past recovering from the ravages of war and hardships of reconstruction. Now Japan had stepped out as an equal among nations, pressing for leadership in the international community. Stereotypes were falling away. Slowly. No longer were images of geisha and samurai what people thought of; endless varieties of electronics and quirky pop singers with pink hair and thigh-high boots were the most noticeable imports. Ben had to smile: he had never had any interest in Asia—not the culture, not the food, not the people, their languages, their fashions, nor their ways of doing business. He had only limited experience, anyway. In college his girlfriend had roomed with an exchange student from Korea. And in high school there was a chubby girl by the name of Yoko, but he never considered she was half-Japanese; she was just another American to him. Then he’d arrived in Hawaii.

4. The Dream Land (subsequently labeled Book I "Long Distance Voyager")

“It’s...glorious,” she whispered, and he was surprised she could be so taken in by her own experiment. He had to agree, touching her hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze: it was beyond their expectations.

5. After Ilium

Alex knew they were talking about him, even though the words were Turkish. They sounded strangely like the drunken mutterings of his fraternity buddies, and the shadows shifted to become his roommate, Nick, with a swarthy face and black, curled beard, like statues of the old Greek king, Agamemnon, that he’d seen in museums. Nick had been killed driving home from spring break six weeks before graduation, a trip Alex had reluctantly declined, citing an important paper that was due. The shadows shifted and Nick was replaced by the image of the doctor—the image of how he thought the doctor appeared.

6. A Beautiful Chill

“We are lovers,” she says, taking his arm so there will be no confusion.

7. The Dream Land (Book II "Dreams of Future's Past")

McElroy lowered his head, seething. He had never hit a woman before, though he had come close several times. He had always managed to hit a wall or a door. Once he hit himself—his head—against a door to release his anger. He did not carry his pistol tonight since they were going out to dinner in a nice restaurant. But he could never hit a woman. He had too much respect for—

8. The Dream Land (Book III "Diaspora")

“No, course not.” Tammy giggled. “They are on another planet. How’m I supposed to have contact with them?”

And I'll also give you a bonus: the fifth paragraph of the fifth page of the fifth chapter of my current work-in-progress, A Dry Patch of Skin, a kind of vampire tale.

I resisted the easy double-entendre and responded thus: “My pleasure.” After all, I’ve learned over the years that the best way to assure anyone comes is to not make jokes until after it happens. (Oh, is that a dirty joke? I’m not sorry, nor am I offended that anyone might be offended. I did not come right out and say anything obscene. That is the beauty of the double-entendre: only those privy to the context find it clever. All others sit dumb-faced like wilted flowers. All right then, I apologize. Next time, bring your own jokes.)

Thus is revealed the fifth of the fifth of the fifth! 

I encourage you to enjoy your tacos, your lightsabers, and should the mood strike you, go ahead and get yourself five books. Share with five friends and your life shall be made five-fold better by your generous acts!



*Yes, it's a word, invented in much the same way as Google became the verb "to google" something, hence to search for information using the Google search engine. I can do that. As a trained linguist, I have a license which allows me the right of word invention.

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(C) Copyright 2010-2014 by Stephen M. Swartz. All Rights Reserved. No part of this blog, whether text or image, may be used without me giving you written permission, except for brief excerpts that are accompanied by a link to this entire blog. Violators shall be written into novels as characters who are killed off. Serious violators shall be identified and dealt with according to the laws of the United States of America.